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Unreliability and confusion do not have to be a part of your dating-over-50 experience, dating coach Bobbi Palmer told Huff/Post50."A lot of people who are dating in their 50s probably haven't dated since they were [in their 20s] -- they're paralyzed, they still have the old vision of themselves and the old vision of the boys they were dating," Palmer said.When it comes to women and dating, I say you can never know enough.And women, lest you think you're off the hook, you're not.There's still the matter of erasing "those recordings that play in your head about men and relationships," Palmer said."'Men only want sex, men don't want relationships...' It's about getting past your limiting beliefs." Palmer acknowledges that these beliefs can become as automatic as "blinking," but said it's a matter of first recognizing that those beliefs exist and working through why you feel that way. "Make a plan of where and how you're going to meet the right men and how to get a date," Palmer advised.Fellas, if you're in your 50s, single and dating (and feeling like you're not getting anywhere), consider this a little friendly feedback from the ladies.Maybe you've heard it all before, maybe it doesn't apply to you, maybe you've got the dating thing down -- it doesn't matter.
Tell us what you think of her advice -- and your own experiences dating after 50 -- in the comments below. So before you rush out looking for love again, it's important to be ok with who you are, said Palmer.See how the relationship unfolds and revisit that list often.But if not, don't be afraid to start all over again."It's about being intellectual with your beliefs and realizing they aren't true," instead of being completely emotional, she said. Whether it's getting online (which is how Palmer met her husband), classes, or social meetups for post 50s, "get out of your house, because a lot of us do the same routine everyday at [this] point in our lives," she said."We need to be proactive in going places where you're going to potentially meet eligible men." Once you've reeled in a man of interest, there are a few things the mature woman dating over 50 needs to know.
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"We all mature -- most of us -- and this is the best time for anyone to date." Though there are new realities to deal with if you're dating after 50 (illness, sandwich generation concerns, menopause or impotence), it shouldn't dampen your love life or make you settle for anyone less than who you deserve.